My own experience has been that the difference between “cute boy” and “creep” is about 10 or 15 years of aging. I’m still pretty much in the same sexual mindset as I was at when I was in my 20s, unfortunately, its just not in as pretty of a package. Such is life.

Its not like I even expect us “older” folks to be regarded as attractive. (Hell, even I don’t like my own aging.) Just don’t expect me to have hung up my libido by 40.

from a guy who has gotten both dirty looks…and smiles. One thing I have always noticed, and women feel free to confirm. If a guy is attractive ala Brad Pitt/Clooney whatever he does in any context is almost always met with a welcoming gesture, a swoon, a giddy up and lets go.
It’s not what you do, if you look good enough. It doesn’t matter.

I think this is endemic of all of society… it’s prejudice which is so ingrained in everyone – woman, man, queer, straight, black, white, Hispanic, Asian, pink w/purple polka-dots – that often we don’t even realize we are doing it. I think that until we let go of some of these preconceived notions (such as: any man over 25 who is interested in sex is “old” or “creepy”) that the discussion on various topics (such as this) will always be stymied.

Anyhow. Great post, lots to think about.
:)

But for the most part, I think it is just a mix of social awkwardness and not knowing how to interact with someone in the sex industry, not knowing how to discuss sex publicly. Not a creepy thing or an old thing. Just a consequence of sexual shame and all that jazz. It is such a harsh judgment to not allow men to be curious, inquisitive and unsure about sexuality.

Dacia – About your example of the would be john. I have had many of those at my presentations on indie Internet porn. Men who think by creating porn they can pay for sex more legally. It is very interesting. I always see right through them.

Well, maybe because some really are and people tend to put labels based on the worst not the best.
That’s the kindof thinking, especially in the sex industry we have to fight with, but it will take a really long time to change the way the majority think. Till that happens older men interested in sex will be called creepy, escorts will be called whores who will scam you from all your money and webcam chathosts will be called whores.
That’s not nice. And with more people talking openly about the industry… That might change. I wish it did as soon as possible.